Relishing the Single Life
These days many people without romantic partners often find themselves feeling lonely, especially when most or all of their friends or family members have their own romantic someone.
Singleness… is not reserved for, or dedicated to, certain groups of people. In almost any community, there are young adults who’ve never had a romantic partner, people who’ve never married, people who’ve split up with their partners, and those who are now widows or widowers. In addition, there are a number of people who rather enjoy their time being solo.
Nonetheless, so often singles may feel pressures from their surroundings– sources that indirectly, or directly, badger them in such a way as to communicate, well, they ought not be single. Such undue pressure can lead some single people, even Christian believers, to perpetually feel down about their singleness.
God, however, has a different take on singleness.
What does God say?
Before we dig deeper into “singleness,” let’s look at why dating and romantic relationships even exist.
The Scriptures’ overarching message is that God is love. And because people are made from His image, we are capable of love. Love is indeed a broad topic. But the kind of love that Christ demonstrated is a love of the will, the love that gives of self for the benefit of another. This is the love that couples’ commit to in their wedding vows. It is the love of God. Other loves – the love of family, friends, and romance — are held together by – and stem from – this love.
Now the Bible speaks little to romantic relationships in terms of dating and courting. As we probe the Scriptures, however, we can learn that God has designed such a relationship with a fruitful goal, showing that even though we can date or court as much as we want, our ultimate desire — whether we’re aware of it or not — is for a loving, faithful and committed marriage (Hebrews 13:4).
Here are more factors about singleness that God wants you to know:
God wants you to be single
This can be disheartening at moments, but God’s design also includes you being single. He pointed out in 1 Corinthians 7:23-35 that He wants you to be free from some of your anxieties through being unmarried. The unmarried person worries about how to please the Lord, unlike the married one whose interests are divided to his or her spouse.
Simply put, this means that singleness is a gift from God, as Paul refers to it in 1 Corinthians 7:7. If you think that the gift you are receiving is less than what people with romantic partners have, think again. Singleness is a gift of God’s favor. It came from God. He has a grand reason for your current situation. Single or in a romantic relationship – either way – there is cause to give thanks.
You can fully devote your time for God
There is one prime reason why God prefers you to be single – He wants you to serve Him with your time. We are made to serve and worship the Lord (Colossians 1: 16). There is much delight just waiting to be taken in spending your time this way.
Being single is a challenge
Of course, being single is not all sunshine and flowers even for those that do enjoy it. Being single can indeed be a challenge, even hurtful at times. While it is perfectly okay to feel these emotions, be reminded that your life is a gift from God– God never, ever considers you “less than” without a romantic partner.
Someone will come along
When the time is right, the Lord will shape your path as so– in His way and in His time (Isaiah 60: 22). While you wait, try to relish the time to pray. Relish, too, not only your singleness, but all that God has placed before you at any time.
Most importantly, remind yourself by internalizing the Scripture, that no other love can replace God’s great love for you (John 3:16). Drink deeply from this bottomless well of truth. God will never let you down– single, dating, married… ever.